Taking on the New Year: 5 questions to ask yourself.

As we approach the end of 2021 and start to consider the beginning of 2022, you will likely be bombarded with ads, Instagram posts, and media sources encouraging New Year’s resolutions, major life changes, and all of the marketing schemes that accompany the idea of New Year’s resolutions. While this is a multi-million dollar marketing scheme that repeats on the calendar every time the new year rolls around, the reality is New Year’s resolutions are often not what work to create change. Several years ago, Forbes published an article sitting that up to 80% of new year’s resolutions fail.

So instead of making goals or focusing on quitting or starting new behaviors, what if we took this moment to reflect, ask ourselves some hard questions, and refrain the idea of a new year and a new start in a way that just might bring about some of the changes and desires that you hoped for.

Here are a few questions to ask yourself as you start the new year and close out the old one: 

— What am I proud of that I accomplished, or what is one area that I have grown? And how has that made a difference? Think about that.  When was the last time you took the time to be proud of yourself for accomplishing something? Pride is often an emotion labeled as unhealthy or inappropriate, but the reality is pride pushes us towards a healthy understanding of self and acknowledgment of abilities. Often times pride is misunderstood for arrogance, which would be the over-assessment of self. Having an accurate understanding of who you are and what your abilities are and exercising power within those abilities helps you be the best you. So what did you accomplish, or where have you grown? How does that represent you living into an aspect of your complete potential gifting‘s or healthy yourself?

— What is one thing that seemed impossible, that I proved was possible? It’s safe to say that 2021 was a year full of challenges. Be that through cultural conflict, job instability, pandemic-related stresses, personal moments of hardship, etc. There likely were many instances where the thought of “I’m not sure this is possible“ entered your mind. Think back and find one of those instances that you were not convinced what was in front of you was possible. What did you do to make that possible? How did you exceed your expectations?

— What is one vice or shortcoming that I need to be mindful or aware of in the next year? This is a big one. We all have vices and shortcomings. Some of us are keenly aware of our natural tendencies to avoid self-sabotage, distort our thinking, or get in the way of our success. Others may not be quite so aware of how some of their own behaviors, tendencies or thought patterns may be a part of their challenges. Take a moment to think about or notice one of your shortcomings that may be interfering with the life that you desire. This may take some reflection if this is not a question that you’ve asked yourself before. You may even need a trusted friend or professional therapist to help you unpack this more if it’s an entirely new concept to you. But this question can truly be the difference between actively working towards healthy goals that you desire and maintaining the same patterns you currently experience.

— What are the relationships that I want to invest most in this next year? As human beings, we are wired for connection, relationships, and interactions with one another. The health, wellness, and quality of these relationships significantly impact the quality of lives that we lead. Take some time to think about the relationships that are most healthy, beneficial, and empowering. What would it look like to invest more in those relationships? Are there some relationships you can identify that may be detrimental to your goals, well-being or take energy from you in ways that you may not have the energy to spend? What might it look like to set boundaries, take a step back, or guard your energy in those areas as you take on a new year?

—  What is one step that I can take to create a healthier future self by this time next year? 

The idea of creating a vision for your future or healthier self is a fantastic practice. Acceptance commitment therapy, an evidence-based therapeutic intervention for anxiety, depression, PTSD, trauma, and more, implements this principle within the therapy intervention based on the values that the individual desires to embody as a part of their best self. If we do not have a vision for the person we want to be or the characteristics we would like to embody, we have no way of intentionally working on getting there. If you’re interested in taking this idea of developing a future self that you are proud of or that represents the healthiest version of yourself further, there’s an amazing practice written by the holistic psychologist that takes this concept into a tangible proactive daily practice. Feel free to learn more about her techniques and principles here. 

If increasing control over your anxiety, depression, mood fluctuations, or tackling your past trauma or addiction is a part of your goals and desires as you take on 2022, professional trained mental health therapists are an amazing resource to access to support you on your journey. If you’re interested in learning more about how our team can help to support you on your journey, feel free to contact us or read more about our trauma therapist, addiction therapist, and online counseling services.